AIG - Need An Incentive? Call Me

Wow, am I glad I’m not one of those AIG bonus babies. Can you imagine what it must be like for them? They are more hated now then Congress! If you have been following my blog, you know I love it when I can say “told you so.”A few weeks ago I wrote about employee incentives and I was pretty clear – even had it in the title – cash is not where it’s at.So it got me thinking. What if Ed Libby, CEO of AIG called and said “Jay, I need something worth a million dollars and I have 73 employees to show my gratitude to, got an INNOVATIVE MARKETING IDEA?”Now I have the advantage of hind sight here; but I think I would have orchestrated an event in front of the Capitol steps and had each bonus baby hand truck in large bags of money as a payback on the debt. You would have to have players from both sides of the aisle in attendance just to make sure you’re getting the message across that we’re all in this together. I would have charged about $5,000 to set that up plus the expenses to get the money bagged and trucked in and of course the hand truck rental fee. Can you get the mental picture of the positive public relations reaction? How many millions of dollars would it cost AIG to get that kind of recognition?But now I have to deal with getting back to Ed and coming up with a way to provide an incentive to those 73.First, a lapel pin made of gold (plating) and jewels so outrageously beautiful and gleaming that everyone who sees it would wonder (and maybe ask) what is that and what did you do to get it?” Think about the lifetime of recognition those 73 would have every time they told the story about bringing the money to Washington.But I wouldn’t stop there; we’ve spent less the twenty bucks so far. Do you think they would appreciate a little incentive travel program? I could put you on to a two week trip that would fly these folks first class to London where they would spend the “funnest” weekend of their lives. Probably could even arrange a private concert with U2, if they were in town. From there, we’re moving – still first class – to Turkey for a five day glamorous land cruise through the ancient and arguably first cultures of western civilization. We still have six days to go and the point is that for less then $15,000 I’ve produced something these folks will always have in their memory.For the trip home, I would probably throw in a Snuggie — you know, the blanket with sleeves. This one would have AIG embroidered subtly over an American Flag to remind them about the gallant gesture.I heard that 11 of the 73 have already left AIG so possibly they are out of work. The $60 million Snuggie sales for 2008 will reassure them another good idea can do it all for them once again (and this time without breaking the bank and sending the whole world into financial chaos).